Friday, April 1, 2011

Bata, Paano Ka 'Ginawa'?

Camporazo, the School Principal
By nature, a CHILD is curious, humble (willing to be taught), inquisitive, longing, and daring!

I would like to share to you the message which I delivered to the preschoolers of Living Heritage Kinder School, La Carlota City when I was invited as their inspirational guest speaker in March 20, 2009 in their moving up program like this one.

Bata, paano ka "ginawa"? (Kid, how you've been reared up?) [is not actually intended for the kids, but for their respective parents.]

I was inspired by the 6 practical principles delineated by James D. MacArthur in his article, "The Functional Family" in Liahona (the official international magazine of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints), February 2009 issue.

First, parents focus your energy on teaching your children correct principles and allowing them to exercise their agency. Making choices have consequences - both good and bad. When you take the role of a manager for you want to control your children and you want desired results, problems arise. Your children resist coercion or compulsion, especially they get older. Rather you should act as coaches, consultants, and guides. You continue granting them greater latitude to make choices and reap consequences. You children have the rights. Remember that!

Second, parents intentionally strengthen your families. Dr. MacArthur said one of the best ways parents can strengthen their families is to establish specific item each week to discuss how the family is doing. And that could be considered as "family discussion time." In so doing, you and your spouse commit to regularly reflect on your family needs. He said if you are too busy to spend time with your son or daughter, you might be sending a message, "You are not very important to me."

Third, relationships are of supreme importance. By listening carefully and being sensitive to the Spirit, you will be more likely to discern how your children are doing and what their needs are. Try to invest time in the relationship in the obvious way like talk together, play together, spend one-on-one time together, and send letters, cards, notes sharing with your affections, give compliments, do something unexpectedly and say: "I love you."

Fourth, parents are active teachers. Adam and Eve were excellent examples of parents being good teachers. They taught their children gospel principles of plan of salvation and the importance of keeping the commandments. You have same responsibility to teach your children not only life skills but also the gospel. You should consider what you teach, and how you teach, when and where. MacArthur observed that effective teaching happens outside a formal or direct teaching setting.

Fifth, parents lead by example. Your children are always watching and observing your behavior, whether you know it or not. Dorothy Law Nolte has written about children live what they learn. The children when they grow up is influenced by the environment in which they are always exposed to. If you want your children to do what you want them to be, you should set as an example. MacArthur advised if you want your children to care about family relationships, you kiss and hug them, smile at them, listen to them, play with them, and share personal experiences with them.

And sixth, parents teach your children by faith in Heavenly Father and in the Lord Jesus Christ. Faith will establish a sure and solid foundation for a family living that is unequaled in any other way. The scripture says, "Ye will teach them to walk in the ways of truth and soberness; ye will teach them to love one another, and to serve one another."

Thus the most important thing you will do in your life will be to teach your family members to have faith in Jesus Christ and His teachings and to keep the commandments. You must remember if you could make your family functional you are just like providing your family the best opportunity you can to grow closer together and to face challenges with a greater sense of harmony and happiness. And I know education will also secure the future of your children.

Thank you and good morning.

(This is my message given on April 1, 2011 during the 6th Moving Up Program of  Preschool of Cubay Elementary School under my administration and supervision as a school principal)

Reference: The Functional Family by James D. MacArthur, PhD


  1. I'm beginning to like you sir. You really have great entries. And yeah, parents should really know how to best explain and teach their children about topics like this.

  2. As a mother, I am doing my best to raise my child the way I wanted her to remember me when I'm gone. And as I have observed, people blame the parents when everything bad happens to a child or when a child goes astray..

  3. Sir ,you really are a good person.I am not wondering why you are most loved by the people in your community . reading your posts makes me know who you really are as a person not only as a leader.

  4. This was indeed a good speech, I believe that parents should support and guide their children so they will learn how to be a better person when they grow old. I lack the guidance of a parent but I am very fortunate to have other people who helpedm supported and mold me to be a good person.

  5. Being a parent is a full-time occupation, even if our children are already adults. Thanks for these great words of wisdom. :)

  6. your speech is very enlightening, it may be a common question we may stumble upon. But the deeper meaning lies on how we as a parent deals with the situation. Your article has very good content.

  7. Nice! I like the message. I just love all the principles. If you will just follow all of those, I bet you will be a better parent to your kids. :)

  8. I enjoyed this post! Great way to reach out. You really have a way with words.

  9. Yes! Very well said.

    I am sometimes feel guilty about parenting and taking care of my kids. Especially my eldest. I feel that he does not really have that "security" and "trust" when it comes to me his dad.

    Truly, I had been so busy working on things back then. Earning for my family and taking care of them at the same time.

    I have to remind myself that family should come first and their growth will not only depend on what they learn on school but also what we parents teach them as they grow up.

  10. Though I can't relate much on this topic sir, I guess my parents, though not perfect, lead a very good example to us their children. My father, a disciplinarian taught me how to be strong despite of adversities and my mother, a teacher, always instill the principle of sensitivity, kindness and humility. Thank you for this post sir.

  11. @ChrisAir, you're out of tune! What's the matter? You've posted your comment in a wrong thread!

  12. Sir, I admire you for giving out such inspirational speech..I hope that the children will take this by heart.

  13. This is so inspiring. I hope I can apply this someday.

  14. Sir Gil, from the very first time I've visited your site, I was really amazed. I want to commend you for sharing the goodness of the Lord boldly and with love. May He continue to bless you.

  15. True. It's great that you value all of this and I really agree with all of them.


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